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Tuesday, August 10, 2010

"Worst Fashion."

Posted by Eden Dawn on Tue, Aug 10, 2010 at 9:00 AM

In an attempt to procrastinate from the massive list of things I have to do as a professor, a fabric designer, someone who is about to move, and someone who has a “To Do” list with 37 items that need completed in the next two days, I did a very logical thing. I Googled the words “worst fashion.” The image results were interesting/borderline offensive but these are some highlights I particularly enjoyed. Do I have to go back to work now?

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Photos: Google Images

Wednesday, July 7, 2010

Demerits.

Posted by Eden Dawn on Wed, Jul 7, 2010 at 11:46 AM

At my day job as a fashion instructor, students delight in sending me fashion atrocities off the web. I believe my affirmation of their awfulness helps validate their fears—in this case, the fear of bad jeans. Refinery 29 compiled a list of some of the worst denim disasters that I would love to hand out demerits to. Be afraid!

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Photos Courtesy: Refinery 29

Tuesday, June 8, 2010

Not Ok.

Posted by Eden Dawn on Tue, Jun 8, 2010 at 10:14 AM

I realize (despite my youthful good looks) that I am much too old to be watching the MTV Movie Awards, but for some unknown reason that is exactly what I did Sunday night. I further surprised myself by not being prepared for the horrible train wrecks that would occur on the red carpet. I can only rid myself of the agony by sharing it:

The Mullet Dress.

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You Left Your Headlights On.

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Uhhhhhhh What.

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Is that Suzanne Somers?

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Photo credit: Bob Charlotte / PR Photos
Photo credit: Mark Davis / MTV / Picturegroup

Monday, April 26, 2010

Hoodie Beat! Octopus Edition

Posted by Marjorie Skinner on Mon, Apr 26, 2010 at 10:18 AM

Wow, this here is a real doozy. Click on over to BuzzFeed for clear instructions on your next DIY octopus hoodie, because... because? I'm so scared for these people. Do not ever go out like this, it could mean your life.

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I put the other one behind the jump because it is just so bad, I didn't want it mucking up the blog with all the pretty shoes.

Continue reading »

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Friday, March 26, 2010

My Baby, My Douchebag

Posted by Wm.™ Steven Humphrey on Fri, Mar 26, 2010 at 9:07 AM

It's pretty important to start your kids off early if you want them to grow up to be douchebags.

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Via gap.com. Hey baby! Where's your soul patch??

Thursday, March 18, 2010

Why America's Next Top Model is STILL Soooo AWESOME!

Posted by Wm.™ Steven Humphrey on Thu, Mar 18, 2010 at 10:09 AM

I'm really liking this new turn that America's Next Top Model is taking—in that they're now actually trying to kill the models. Behold poor Alexandra who pulls a hilarious double FAIL on national TV by slipping down a flight of stairs, and then getting knocked off the runway by a giant swinging gong. (I know... confusing. Just watch.)

Wednesday, December 30, 2009

Mogwai for Your Minge*

Posted by Marjorie Skinner on Wed, Dec 30, 2009 at 10:19 AM

FOR THE LOW, LOW PRICE OF ONLY $2,100!!!!!!

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For the truly misguided Gremlins fanatic, this Lady Gaga-pandering piece is available here and via.

*Excuse the Britishism but I just spent a week of staycation watching marathons of Little Britain and practicing bad accents.

Tuesday, December 1, 2009

The Cupcake Bubble

Posted by Marjorie Skinner on Tue, Dec 1, 2009 at 1:15 PM

Have you heard the micro-economic theory on cupcakes? The cupcake trend (try them instead of a wedding cake!) has created a "cupcake bubble" wherein too many cupcake specialty stores have sprung up to meet what will soon be a diminishing demand in the face of waffles the next big fad in carb- and sugar-loading. As someone with a virtually non-existent sweet tooth, I don't really care one way or the other, just as long as the cupcake people are willing take this with them on their way out:

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Only $175 on Etsy!

Tuesday, November 24, 2009

Today in Lady Gaga

Posted by Wm.™ Steven Humphrey on Tue, Nov 24, 2009 at 10:18 AM

While some are calling this outfit "Frankengaga," I think she looks more like a Transformer, if Transformers turned into sofas from Ikea. Your thoughts?

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P.S. I don't like her.

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Monday, November 16, 2009

Acceptable?

Posted by Courtney Ferguson on Mon, Nov 16, 2009 at 9:58 AM

I saw a non-hippie girl wearing these barefoot shoes over the summer and didn't think twice about it. But this weekend I saw an attractive, non-hippie guy wearing these and was utterly repulsed. Why am I having such a strong reaction about a dude wearing these shoes, and no volatile lady reaction? Maybe because she was at a park and he was at a bar on a Saturday night? I'm not sure.

Would you accompany someone out in public if they were wearing these?

Think of all the things that could get caught between those creepy little toes. Shudder.
  • Think of all the things that could get caught between those creepy little toes. Shudder.

Thursday, October 29, 2009

Stupid Thing The Internet Coughed up into My Lap of The Day: "Handerpants"

Posted by Marjorie Skinner on Thu, Oct 29, 2009 at 11:52 AM

Um, thanks (?) to Merc music editor Ezra Caraeff for the lead, via the Consumerist, to Handerpants.

The sad thing is that the very next thing I am going to do after publishing this post is Facebook-message that link to my aunt, who I can predict with reasonable certainty will purchase at least one pair of Handerpants and give them to my dad for Christmas. Sorry, pops.

Monday, September 21, 2009

Bad Obama-Wear

Posted by Marjorie Skinner on Mon, Sep 21, 2009 at 11:02 AM

This just in via Go Fug Yourself's Emmy Awards fuggage:

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I know he has other pressing things to worry about, but the president should just appoint someone to look after his brand. Have you ever seen a good Obama-themed article of clothing? Isn't this something the Project Runway people should get on? I have a pair of Obama socks, and even those suck. They don't breathe at all.

Thursday, August 20, 2009

Wink, Wink

Posted by Marjorie Skinner on Thu, Aug 20, 2009 at 10:26 AM

Um... just watch:

Wednesday, July 15, 2009

The Reversible Zombie Shirt

Posted by Wm.™ Steven Humphrey on Wed, Jul 15, 2009 at 4:08 PM

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…or is that a zombie wearing a reversible "pasty white male nipples" shirt? Anyhoo, Capcom will be giving these beauties away to promote their new Resident Evil video game at Comi-Con next week. (Warning: Those in attendance should prepare to be blinded by pale rolls of flesh.)

Nipple tips to BuzzFeed!

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Monday, June 1, 2009

A Word on Zippers

Posted by Marjorie Skinner on Mon, Jun 1, 2009 at 4:48 PM

I've considered posting on this issue before, and I've had conversations with several Portland designers about it already. Perhaps I hesitated to publish anything because it seems like it should go without saying that if you're making and selling clothing under your own name that you would want to put the best materials into it. But, well, here's what happened:

Yesterday I busted out a piece that I'd had made to measure from a Portland designer who shall remain nameless. I love the piece, and I bought it because it's a great design—BUT, it has a zipper running all the way up the back, and it's not a YKK, which as far as I can tell if it's not a YKK, it's shit. True to form, as I sat—in public—at a café yesterday, the zipper split, leaving me with the entire back of my outfit hanging open, looking like a jackass. The only thing saving me from indecent exposure was the American Apparel bodysuit I was wearing underneath. I'm going to try to have the zipper replaced, because I really do love the piece, but I'm just putting it out there as a reminder: YKK, all the way.

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(photo via Pattern Solutions)

Friday, May 22, 2009

Screw YOU, Snuggie! I'm Getting a Wearable Towel!

Posted by Wm.™ Steven Humphrey on Fri, May 22, 2009 at 4:27 PM

Put on a Snuggie? ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME? It's like a billion degrees outside! I need something that I can comfortably wear while walking around in the office, or leading staff meetings. Oh, and I don't want to wear underpants either. WHAT SHOULD I BUY??

Wednesday, May 20, 2009

Your Stupid Hat and You

Posted by Wm.™ Steven Humphrey on Wed, May 20, 2009 at 2:00 PM

There are a few things not invited back to this summer (fashion wise) and one of them is HATS. Look, there is absolutely NO REASON to wear a hat in Portland. It's never hot enough to warrant one, and when you signed up to join the rest of us here, you made a solemn vow to never cover your head with ANYTHING. Especially when it's raining.
Anyway, I'm really sick of people wearing those dumb Frank Sinatra hats, and as a general rule, you should never buy or wear anything that can be purchased at a kiosk in the Lloyd Center mall. Don't believe me? Here are some pictures of you wearing stupid hats, so you can see how stupid you look in them.

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Nice hat, stupid! (And for that leather jacket, you get extra stupid points.)

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Jesus Christ. Are ya stupid? I think you just may be!

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Fuck YOU, stupid!

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Actually, she looks pretty. Pretty fucking stupid!!

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Hey baby! You look stupid in your stupid fucking hat, stupid!

Tuesday, May 19, 2009

So, I'm Thinking About Having Sex with a Panther…

Posted by Wm.™ Steven Humphrey on Tue, May 19, 2009 at 4:34 PM

…and that's exactly why I've decided to start using Jovan Musk for Men as my aftershave of choice. Mmm… can anyone magically transport me back to 1987? THANKS!!

Tuesday, March 31, 2009

It's Prom Night at Vagina High!

Posted by Wm.™ Steven Humphrey on Tue, Mar 31, 2009 at 1:21 PM

Prom season is just around the corner, and if you're looking for that perfect gown that says, "I would like you to stick your penis in my big pink vagina," I think I've found it!

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Monday, March 16, 2009

Top Model Stampede!

Posted by Wm.™ Steven Humphrey on Mon, Mar 16, 2009 at 11:50 AM

Terror struck NYC's America's Next Top Model auditions on Saturday when an overheated car inspired some confused person to yell, "BOMB!!" And if you think there's anything more terrifying than hundreds of wannabe Tyra's emitting teakettle whistle screams and trampling you with their fuck-me pumps, then you have quite an imagination. (No need to watch the whole thing.)


And here's the news report of the incident. Please note the pun "not model behavior" is used TWICE, and who's that "regular guy" collecting the model's pictures and phone numbers? Oh! A PERVERT. It is NYC after all.

Monday, January 19, 2009

Today, I Am Sappy

Posted by Marjorie Skinner on Mon, Jan 19, 2009 at 3:45 PM

I have been wiped out for the past couple of days, and perhaps I simply don't have the energy for meanness, but when a coworker instant messaged me with this link to a story (?) making fun of something Miley Cyrus was wearing, it just completely hit me the wrong way.

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I don't really know who Cyrus is or what she does (something on TV? Posing for Vanity Fair?), but all I'm seeing here is a teenager in a wacky outfit. Wacky outfits were one of the best things about being a teenager, as far as I'm concerned. Not to get all soapbox-y but is anyone else as over it as I am?

Miley doesn't even know who Iron Maiden is. The bitch probably thinks it's something you buy at Wal-Mart to make grilled cheeses. And even Brit Brit wouldn't be caught flashing her shaved possum pie in those boots.

Meh. I just don't think it's funny anymore. I hardly ever even read Go Fug Yourself these days. Did I mention that today is supposed to be the saddest day of the year? At least we know that tomorrow will be better.

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